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Two and a Half Men
Fr 19:05, Mo-Th 19:10
· Rerun Mo-Su At night
A hedonistic jingle writer's free-wheeling life comes to an abrupt halt when his brother and nephew move into his beach-front house.
- Country of originUnited States
- Year when published2008
- CastJon Cryer, Charlie Sheen, Angus T. Jones
S6:E19
The Two Finger Rule
Charlie, Alan, and Herb commiserate with one another when their stupid decisions put them on the outs with their significant others.
S2:E11
Last Chance to See Those Tattoos
Charlie sets out to find who started a derogatory web site about him. Meanwhile, Alan overhears something he shouldn't on Jake's webcam.
S5:E17
Fish in a Drawer
Parody of "CSI" in which a body is found in Charlie's bed, and detectives try to figure out who is the killer.
S2:E12
A Lung Full of Alan
An old classmate is in town while Charlie and Alan spar over whom she likes more.
S6:E20
Hello, I am Alan Cousteau
Charlie is disturbed when his mother meets Chelsea and starts spending time with her, but he has a plan for revenge.
S5:E18
If My Hole Could Talk
Charlie dates a self-help author who is much older than he is, has a 32-year-old son and treats Charlie more like a son than a boyfriend. Jake tries to write a book report over the weekend but keeps losing the book before he can read it.
S6:E11
The Devil's Lube
Charlie contemplates making some changes in his life after an old buddy and partner in crime drops dead on the balcony of his beach house.
S2:E3
A Bag Full of Jawea
After Jake flips off his teacher, Alan and Judith move to punish him. Charlie, meanwhile, has other plans for Jake's teacher. Chaos ensues when Jake discovers the relationship and the increasingly overbearing Miss Pasternak tells Charlie she believes God brought them together.
S6:E12
Thank God for Scoliosis
Alan considers hooking up with his receptionist--until he meets her mother, and Charlie and Jake fight for the affection of a beautiful woman.
S2:E4
Go Get Mommy's Bra
After Charlie reluctantly lends Evelyn his new car, he later discovers her bra in the back seat. Meanwhile, Alan is forced to compensate after Jake gets attached to Judith's rich and talented boyfriend.
S5:E9
Tight's Good
Charlie ignores his future step-father's advice and gets involved with his daughter, and he learns the hard way that he should have heeded the warning.
S6:E13
I Think You Offended Don
Judith is pregnant, Alan believes he is the father, and Judith tries to keep him away from Herb. Meanwhile, Charlie tries to figure out why Jake is so irritable.
S2:E5
Bad News from the Clinic
Charlie is dating a self-assured woman who plays hard to get, easily dismisses him, and he finds it disarming. Rose gets Charlie to see that his new lady-friend, Sherry, is in his head because she is just like him; a self-centered, manipulative, narcissist. Charlie debates breaking it off. Alan and Jake fiercely battle wills over Jake doing his homework.
S5:E10
Kinda Like Necrophilia
Alan finds out that Charlie stole his girlfriend in high school, so he sets out to even the score.
S6:E14
David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie
After his family acts mean-spirited during Alan's "surprise" birthday party, Alan decides he's had enough and moves in with his girlfriend and her mom.
S2:E6
The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance
After confessing responsibility for a childhood shoplifting incident blamed on Alan, Charlie seeks the forgiveness of his now-infuriated brother.
S5:E11
Meander to Your Dander
Alan's latest relationship has grown stale, so he turns to Charlie for advice about how to break up with her.
S6:E15
I'd Like to Start with the Cat
Charlie's big mouth and lack of attention to details gets him in couples counseling with his girlfriend.
S2:E7
A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana
Evelyn announces she is receiving an honor from the real estate industry and that Charlie and Alan will host a party in her honor. Mayhem ensues when Berta and her sister agree to cater the event, but sibling rivalry takes center stage.
S5:E12
A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
Charlie is suffering from a bad cold, and Rose suddenly and mysteriously resurfaces to "take care of him." So why isn't Charlie getting any better?
S5:E13
The Soil is Moist
Alan sleeps with a woman he and Judith were friends with when they were married, who then tells him that Judith says her new husband is a better lover than him.
S2:E8
Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers
Alan gets carried away with a woman he met at the supermarket, and it's up to Charlie to talk some sense into him while shielding Jake and Judith from what's going on.
S6:E16
She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime
Charlie needs Alan and Jake's help getting rid of the drunk, half-naked bimbo passed out in his bed when his girlfriend tells him she's coming home early from a funeral.
S6:E17
The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?
Charlie is so desperate to get Chelsea to return his accidental "I love you" and not lose control in the relationship that he is willing to propose to her just to make her say it.
S2:E9
Yes, Monsignor
Charlie runs into a newly-divorced ex, now single mom, who's willing to give him another shot. Back home, Jake tries to diagnose his learning problems.
S5:E14
Winky-Dink Time
Charlie sets up Alan with a prostitute and accompanies Jake on a double date.
S6:E18
My Son's Enormous Head
Charlie has trouble trying to take care of Chelsea when she gets sick.
S2:E10
The Salmon Under My Sweater
Charlie struggles to write a jingle for a new cartoon. Meanwhile, Alan spends time with Rose, and Jake procrastinates doing a book report.
S5:E15
Rough Night in Hump Junction
Charlie is acting even more promiscuous than normal, which is getting him in trouble with a lot of husbands and boyfriends. With the help of his psychiatrist, he discovers it's related to his ex-fiancée's upcoming wedding.
S5:E16
Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty
Alan helps to plan his mother's wedding, and Charlie makes some moves on the woman who will soon be his stepsister.
S6:E21
Above Exalted Cyclops
Chelsea sets up Alan with her new "friend" Rose--the same Rose who stalked Charlie for years. But to Charlie's surprise, the two of them hit it off.
S2:E13
Zejdz z Zmoich Wlosów
Tensions rise after an earthquake displaces Judith to Charlie's house.
S5:E19
Waiting for the Right Snapper
Alan has a crush on Charlie's new older girlfriend and Charlie discovers that he "dated" his girlfriend's son's fiancée. Meanwhile, Alan tries to get Jake to study for his algebra exam.
S6:E1
Taterhead Is Our Love Child
Charlie runs into an ex with a child who looks and acts a lot like him, and he starts to suspect that he is the boy's father.
S6:E22
Sir Lancelot's Litter Box
Charlie winds up in more hot water with Chelsea because he doesn't want her moving in with him.
S2:E14
Those Big Pink Things with Coconut
Evelyn's condescending attitude towards Jake's good grades sets Charlie and Alan out for revenge.
S6:E23
Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth
Charlie is angry when Alan and Chelsea become good friends, until he figures out how to use the situation to his advantage.
S2:E15
Smell the Umbrella Stand
Charlie and Alan's weekend trip to Las Vegas has a little trouble getting off the ground.
S6:E2
Pie Hole, Herb
Charlie kicks Alan out of the house again after Alan demands that Charlie pay him back the $38 he owes him. Alan and Jake are now forced to turn to Judith and Herb for a temporary home.
S6:E24
Baseball Was Better with Steroids
Chelsea is jealous when Charlie's ex fiancée, Mia, calls him--perhaps rightfully so. Meanwhile, Judith goes into labor, Herb is incapacitated, and Alan runs into his ex-girlfriend and receptionist at the hospital.
S2:E16
Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?
It's the week of hell as Judith's out of town, Alan's got Jake, and nothing seems to be going right.
S6:E3
Damn You, Eggs Benedict
Alan tries to date two women at once; Charlie tries to learn how to cook; Jake tells Alan that he's studying with a friend, but gets drunk instead.
S7:E1
Chelsea encourages Charlie to help his ex-fiancée Mia launch her music career, but does he still have feelings for her? And what if she's a terrible singer? Meanwhile, Alan wants Charlie to let Melissa move in with him.
S2:E17
Woo-Hoo, a Hernia-Exam!
Berta teaches Jake something about cleanliness while Charlie's in pain after a sexual encounter goes horribly wrong.
S6:E4
The Flavin' and the Mavin'
Alan is angry when Charlie hooks up with his secretary because he knows that the situation will end badly for him after their inevitable breakup.
S2:E18
It Was Mame, Mom
Charlie cons Alan into being his date at his gay friend's dinner party. But how long can they keep up the act?
S7:E2
Whipped Unto the Third Generation
When Charlie's fiancée Chelsea convinces him to let Alan's girlfriend Melissa move in, the girls take over the house.
S6:E5
A Jock Strap in Hell
Charlie gets more than he bargained for when he tries to make amends to one of Jake's old teachers that he dated, who went off the deep end and became a stripper after he broke up with her.
S2:E19
A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise
A freak food-flinging accident leaves Alan with impaired vision, which doesn't bode well especially when he draws a liking to one of Charlie's exes.
S7:E3
Mmm, Fish. Yum.
Alan is forced to take care of Judith's baby when Judith's mom falls off the wagon, and Jake tries to blackmail Charlie when he runs over Chelsea's cat.
S6:E6
It's Always Nazi Week
Alan is overjoyed when he learns that Judith and Herb's marriage is on the rocks, but he gets more than he bargained for when he tries to fake-comfort her. Meanwhile, Herb tries picking up women with Charlie's help.
S2:E20
I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey
Rose intervenes after Alan and Charlie come to blows over some of their unresolved issues.
S7:E4
Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator
Alan takes a job with his mom so that he can move out and have alone time with Melissa, and Chelsea is upset about the way that Jake is treating her.
S6:E7
Best H.O. Money Can Buy
Alan and Judith start seeing each other again after Judith's breakup with Herb, Herb continues to turn to Charlie for help picking up women, and Charlie messes with Jake by threatening to get him sent to military school.
S7:E5
For the Sake of the Child
Jake refuses to stay with Charlie and Alan after they embarrass him in public, so Alan tries to convince Charlie to work together to settle their differences and stop fighting with each other.
S2:E21
A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On
After one of her ex-husbands dies, Evelyn summons Alan, Charlie, and Jake to the funeral, where Charlie takes a keen interest in the widow.
S6:E8
Pinocchio's Mouth
Charlie's month-long relationship threatens to go down the tubes when she asks him to spend the night at her house instead. Alan grounds Jake for mooning some girls on a school bus.
S2:E22
That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother
Alan borrows money from Evelyn to buy a Porsche. However, life doesn't become as glamorous as he expects.
S7:E6
Give Me Your Thumb
Alan suggests that Chelsea get breast reduction surgery and Charlie kicks him out.
S6:E9
The Mooch at the Boo
Alan realizes what a babe magnet Charlie's car can be while Charlie is left with the neighbor when his daughter disappears with Jake.
S7:E7
Untainted by Filth
After Charlie and Chelsea set their wedding date, Charlie and Alan go out and get drunk and wake up in bed together with a strange woman.
S2:E23
Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab
After finding out that Jake has spent the night at his other grandparents' house, Evelyn insists that Jake spend a night at her place. After convincing Jake to stay at her place, Alan and Charlie worry about how Jake will be affected by his overnight visit.
S6:E10
He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited
When Evelyn offers to pay for Jake's college education and a car, Charlie suspects that she has an angle to play.
S7:E8
Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.
Charlie invites Chelsea's sexy friend to stay at his place while she gets over a breakup, secretly hoping that he will get a chance to have kinky three-way sex.
S2:E24
Does This Smell Funny to You
Jake recounts his weekend in which Charlie's latest fling is with a woman who turns out to be married to a now very angry old man.
S7:E9
Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair
Charlie is crushed when he discovers that he hasn't been satisfying Chelsea; Alan attempts to cure his thinning hair on the cheap.
S3:E1
Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts
After Alan falls off the roof, Charlie has to look after the adolescent and increasingly obnoxious Jake for the weekend.
S7:E10
That's Why They Call It 'Ball Room'
Charlie discovers that Chelsea hasn't been completely honest about her finances.
S3:E2
Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
Alan must lobby Jake's principal to keep him from getting expelled, leaving Charlie to manage the chiropractic office for the day.
S7:E11
Warning, It's Dirty
Against Alan's wishes, Charlie encourages Jake to hook up with a pretty girl he met on the beach since Jake's girlfriend is out of town for Christmas.
S3:E3
Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
After it's revealed Alan and Judith have been trying to reconcile, Charlie, Evelyn, and Rose vie for the role of spoiler.
S7:E12
Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste
Jake writes love songs to woo back his ex-girlfriend; Herb and Alan hide their secret friendship from Judith's watchful eye.
S3:E4
Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
Alan looks for a new place after he invites Berta to stay at Charlie's house, bringing the brothers to blows.
S7:E13
Yay, No Polyps
Charlie endures a colonoscopy to get out of a trip to see Chelsea's bigoted parents, only to find them in his living room when he returns home.
S3:E5
We Called It Mr. Pinky
Charlie's inability to reciprocate his girlfriend's love forces him to examine his relationships with women.
S7:E14
Crude and Uncalled For
Alan ends up in jail after a bar fight, and Charlie worries that Chelsea might be interested in the lawyer who takes the case.
S3:E6
Hi, Mr. Horned One
Charlie's Satan-worshiping girlfriend has a knack for the supernatural, and seems to be the cause of some strange happenings around the Harper house.
S7:E15
Aye, Aye, Captain Douche
When Charlie's jealousy threatens his relationship with Chelsea, he turns to Alan for help in becoming a better person. But will he be able to pull it off?
S3:E7
Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
Charlie gets drunk and sleeps with Rose on her birthday. Rose says she knows it's no big deal. But her father quickly shows up at Charlie's house, under the impression that they've been dating for two years.
S7:E16
Tinkle Like a Princess
Charlie reacts to his breakup with Chelsea by taking the first woman that he sees and marrying her in Las Vegas.
S3:E8
That Voodoo That I Do Do
Charlie bribes Jake into taking ballet lessons so he can vie for the affections of the teacher. Things go awry, however, when Charlie and Jake find themselves competing for those affections.